Anticipation

As most Vikings fans like myself anticipate the Vikings vs. Packers showdown. We also anticipate the reaction Favre will receive. I am anticipating something bigger. What's bigger than a important divisional game, with Favre returning to Lambeau after playing there for 16 years? I am anticipating the birth of my first child.

I've spent the last 9 months answering and pondering the question? Are you ready? My response and feeling is that it doesn't matter. There is no turning back now. I'm going to be a dad in no more than 72 hours. People often say that the greatest day of their life is the birth of their child. How do you prepare for the greatest day of your life?

So am I ready? I'd like to say yes, but I'm afraid the answer is no. Does that mean I'm going to fail, probably not. I have spent the better part of my life planning and organizing things. I'm one of those people that likes have a plan. I don't like a lot of spontaneity in my life. Sure I can handle a change of plans or surprise now and then, but I like to know whats coming. So what is coming? A 24/7 responsibility for the rest of my life. I'm the guy that's eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich every time my wife hasn't been home to prepare a meal. I'm not talking like 2 or 3 times. When eating dinner by myself I'm like the Brett Favre or Cal Ripken of PB and J meals.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about Rusty and his life. I remember all the times when I was a kid, saying and thinking about when I have a kid, all of the things I'd do different. But now looking back, I think I'll do much of the same. I couldn't believe my parents made me do my homework every night instead of going back for another game of street football with Billy, Bobby, and Danny. I'll have a lot of time to prepare for certain situations with Rusty. I mean for the next year or so, he'll be a human depository, with no social skills, and terrible communication habits. But it's after that, that what I think about. How much do I want him to be like me? How much information do I force into his developing brain. On the flip side how much freedom do I give him? I have lived a life with a ton of freedom. My parents gave me plenty of freedom, sometime I took advantage of it, and sometimes I didn't. My wife gives me tons of freedom. Sometimes I take advantage of it(read the high school hockey tournament blog), sometime I don't. I want Rusty to make mistakes. I want Rusty to lose and fail. I think those things make a person stronger. It'll make him work that much harder to try and win and succeed. I don't want him to lose, fail, and make mistakes for 20 years like the timberwolves, but I'm not expecting a Yankees like philosophy either.

Nature vs. Nurture was always interesting to me, and now I'm going to sit court side and watch. I think there is a fair argument to both sides. I think nature and nurture actually come to a tie. I think it will be a challenge keeping it balanced. I can't pick his friends, but his friends will have a major impact. I don't want to be the Brad Childress of parenting. I will have a game plan, but I may need to call an audible every once in a while. I also want Rusty to scramble and make a play if the defense outsmarts us both. I don't want Rusty to be afraid to take risks. I want Rusty to go for 2 and the win at the end of the game, when an extra point will tie it up. I think that so many people now days are so afraid of failing that they never take a chance to succeed.

I think what I anticipate the most is myself. How will I transform into the next stage of my life. Am I ready to move on, do I have to move on? I'm sure most people experience these thoughts on the eve of having a child. I'm going to go into this wishing and hoping that Rusty will enjoy his life as much as I have. I'm not going to worry about global warming, or terrorism. I don't even really care whether the President is republican or Democrat. I am going to make sure that Rusty has the resources he needs to succeed. I'm not going to force him to wear a bike helmet. My philosophy will be this, "If you fall off your bike onto your head, you should either not ride a bike or be more careful and not fall on your head." I'm not going to make Rusty run laps in the back yard, preparing him to become the center fielder for the Yankees. I'm not going to make him throw 200 footballs through a tire every night preparing him to become the quarterback of the Dallas Cowboys. I"m going to live my life, and let him live his. I'll be there as a base coach while he's running the bases. But if he gets picked off like Nick Punto against the Yankees, he's gonna sit on the bench for a while.
I'm going to approach this with a open mind. There are going to be highs and there will be lows. And I'm going to be prepared for both. I'm going to let Rusty choose his path in life . . . . as long as he ends up being a defensemen on the Gophers hockey team. So go ahead Heather pop at any time I'm ready.